Most Embarrassing Moment in Japan

I am reluctant to leave thoughts of Japan behind and yet as the days pass, the sharpness of the memories fade. It becomes easier to forget the details. I did keep a journal while we were there, so from time to time I still may post something about the trip. I didn't think you would want to miss this story though. It isn't one I will easily forget.

Japanese toilets are interesting. The traditional toilet looks like a trough you squat over. I didn't take a picture of a functioning one, but I've included one from a museum. Don't get excited about the pretty design. I believe this one came from a palace. All the ones I used were your basic white. For you men, that's the urinal on the left side. Isn't it pretty?

Sometimes the Japanese style toilet was the only choice and if you gotta go, you gotta go. I did have a moment of wondering what would happen if you had the stomach flu......yeah, not a pleasant thought, so let's move on. In some place you might have the option of choosing a European (or western) toilet. The thing that was intriguing to me is that so many times it would be this basic squat style or a western style that was completely over the top. All I really needed was the bowl and a way of flushing it. These were like little spas. Here is a picture of the options from one of our hotels. This particular one has a remote control for the options. Many had the controls on the side of the toilet itself or on the wall. Please understand these were not just in the hotels, but in many public places.

This one is the basic model, with a limit on the bells and whistles. I'm only slightly kidding about the bells and whistles, as many of the models actually have noises to choose from such as a babbling brook, music, and flushing sounds. This of course is to cover up your own bodily noises. Honestly, if I were standing, waiting outside of the door and I really had to go, I'd be very frustrated with a flushing sound that wasn't actually a flushing toilet. You know how it is, the closer you get to the bathroom, the worse you have to go. That is a mean trick to play on the bladder.

I'm getting to the best part of this story, hang with me. We are at a place called Oasis 21 in Nagoya. Above ground is an awesome structure that you can walk around and it has water with fountains, etc. There is no way to explain it, I'll include a picture.

It is a shopping mall underground which connects to the subway station. In the center there is a large stage and open area for concerts and events. We had dinner there at a sushi restaurant and then a little Baskin Robbins for dessert. It was green tea ice cream for me. Yum!

Before we head back to our hotel, I decide to visit the restroom. I take my turn and enter the stall. I'm already a little anxious as I see it is a luxury commode. Lots of bells and whistles.....but which button is the one for the real flush? I should have memorized the kanji for "flush". I finish up and take another desperate look around. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO FLUSH THE TOILET!!! It wouldn't be polite not to flush, and besides there was a line, they would know it was me, the American. I feel like I am taking way too much time, so I just push a button. Ah, the stool flushes, but an alarm sounds simultaneously. I had just called in emergency back up!!!

There was nothing I could do but make an exit, knowing full well there was going to be an audience. I open the door to find the attendant, a small Japanese woman, in a panic on the other side. I took a bow. What else could I do?

Here is the irony. On this side of the world my bow would have signified that I had just completed a performance. Over there, my bow said, "I am sorry and humble before you." The truth, I was humble.....okay, I was embarrassed. We went to the same place later in the week. This time I got it....just wave your hand over a certain place on the wall...because that makes so much sense.